another week in india...

i would first like to say that God is teaching me patience...i have been at this internet cafe for over an hour and finally was able to get on and read all your comments and update. forgive me for not acknowledging them last week. i didn't realize they were there, but as i read them, it was as if i could see and hear each and every one of you like we were talking face to face. i wept. my eyes are still full of tears and the Indian gentleman that runs the place looked at me as if i were crazy. it's not anything new really-- the Indians always just think we are a bunch of "crazy Americans." ha. thank you all very much for your kind words and prayers though. they really mean more than i can express.

i brought my journal along with me this time so that i can more quickly put my jumbled thoughts into coherent words for you all to read. since i wrote last, a lot has happened. after we returned monday evening from the cafe, we had dinner. they brought sandwiches for us from town and i made the mistake of eating the "spicy one" while everyone else had cheese and tomato or something similar. the next afternoon, i started to feel pretty awful as i headed over to the orphanage to meet the children after their school day. eric, liz, and jess sent me back and before i knew it, i had turned the fans off in our room, put on a sweatshirt and sweatpants, and was still freezing! let me say, you never feel cold in india. whenever i do anything, i sweat now. i realized i had a fairly high fever-- i am guessing 102 or 103 by the way i felt. when the others returned they immediately gave me tylenol and a motion sickness med because of my constant urge to vomit. God spared me from that end, but not the other if you catch my drift. (sorry for those of you that don't appreciate details, but i was on my death bed!) i cried and just wanted a soft bed and my mom. they laid hands on me and prayed for me though and i was sure that God would make me better-- i was supposed to visit the hospital and the doctor and nurse i would be working with the next day! helen, the wife of the man that used to run the orphanage, lives across the hall and she and her husband watch out for us. she was very worried and stood in the doorway the whole time they prayed for me. when they were finished, she hobbled in and said, "pray in tamil." she placed her cold hand on my forehead and started saying what i know was one of the most heartfelt prayers i ever witnessed. i couldn't understand a word she uttered, but there was power in it. i felt the Spirit overcome me and i sobbed the entire time she interceded. i wish i could more adequately explain what happened between us in that moment, but i don't know how to describe it. all i can say is that i felt the Spirit more in those few minutes than i have ever felt tangibly in my life. it was something i will never forget. it amazes me how i couldn't even properly tell her thank you b/c we don't share a common tongue, but we certainly share the same God. He touched me through her prayer, even when i couldn't understand-- God overcame a language barrier and used helen in my life. i am amazed by that. needless to say, it was still a hard night, but i woke the next morning feeling fine. i still was not able to go anywhere that day b/c i was fairly weak (liz and eric went to the hospital without me!), but God healed my body of food poisoning and had touched my spirit in the meantime. i will forever be thankful that i came down with such a miserable sickness-- it allowed me to see Him in a way i never had before. praise Him!

i was able to call home on wednesday and that was such a blessing. mom, dad, grandma sharon-- it was good to talk with you all and hear your voice. thank you for praying. on thursday, my first day back with the staff and kids, i had the most amazing time. it was eric's first day away from us and our first day to try and rough it without him. we were overwhelmed by the thought of it, but God blessed our day with laughter and good fellowship and teaching with Nivya (our translator) and just between the three of us. in fact, since he's been gone, it has been nothing but God showing up. He is faithful and there is never a moment i feel as if He has left me, even when i'm seemingly flying by the seat of my pants. :) thursday night as i journaled though, i was filled with brokenness. i shall share an excerpt:

The children here at the orphanage would be starving without this place. They would be receiving no education and would possibly never come to hear about Christ. Those children didn't choose to be born in India and they didn't choose to have a hard life- it chose them. Tonight I feel thankful that God chose to give me an "easy" life and that He chose for me to come here to this place so I could appreciate it even more. These children have so much love to give and I cannot describe how wonderful it feels to have 4 little hands in mine at once while a little one tugs at my skirt. They call me "sister" and give me kisses and I would love nothing more than to shove a few in my suitcase and take them home with me. Oh, that God would give me strength to love them BOLDLY. I don't want to fly home with one ounce of love left in me that could have been given, both to the children or the staff. Tonight I go to bed humbled by being in His service."

oh, how i wish you could all be here with me! i cry thinking about leaving this place and sometimes find myself desiring to hold back, not to give too much of my heart b/c i anticipate how difficult it will be to tell them goodbye, not knowing if i will ever be able to return to this place. so please pray that i will give them all of me-- even when it's hard. they run when they see us coming now and it is a sight i will hopefully capture on video for you all! :) they yell to be picked up and then snuggle in really close when we do. please also be praying that we would not get head lice from the kids! we love to cuddle them and they all have it from sleeping on straw mats on tile floor all crowded in a room together. if i get it, it won't be the end of the world, but i'm putting in requests to the Big Guy that i won't!

we're still teaching the staff English in the mornings, followed by creative study. they have requested that starting this monday we teach them study for the staff alone-- they think they know ways to teach the children by now. although that is intimidating, i am also amazed at their desire to grow and thankful for it. they still don't quite understand that there is more than one posture of prayer and that it is okay to give me prayer requests. i have been meeting with Sumin and Ezhyl and when i say, "how can i pray for you?" they never mention anything about themselves. it's not Indian culture to open up about struggles or be anything but "fine." slowly but surely i think we are getting the message across. be praying for those two specifically, that He would strengthen our bond in Him and a relationship of trust and intimacy would be formed.

we head over to the home around 4:30 in the afternoon to meet the kids, play with them, and teach them songs. we'll be tutoring the older ones in English from 6:30-8:00 this week as well. today we definitely flew by the seat of our pants, as the staff arranged 3 hours with the kids in the chapel for us! we were told they would have curriculum they needed help with, etc. and that they might want to be taught a song. well, when we arrived at 9 am, that was definitely not the case! God was faithful though and led us in ways to occupy three hours' time! ha. it was scary! they now know three new English worship songs (with actions, of course) and learned the story of Saul on the road to Damascus. we sent the little ones away then and helped the older with English we'd been teaching the staff all week. whew! minor catastrophe avoided!

that's really all for now though-- we're headed back soon to see the kids! :) oh, i guess i did do LOTS of laundry by hand in a sink today. talk about hard work! mom, you would be so proud! hahaha. there have been more creatures (ticks are prevalent as well- sick!), but that's commonplace by now. ha.

thank you again for all your prayers. i hope the update on how God is moving is as encouraging to you all as it is for me to see. i have not forgotten for one second that i have brought many people with me to india for this journey and i pray for you all daily. may God bless you all and give you opportunities to see His Kingdom everyday as i see it here. to Him goes all the glory. i love you all and hopefully will be back again next week to write. if you don't hear from me for a while, don't worry. accesss is just limited. until then, much love and prayers and blessings! miss you!

p.s. good luck to steven and josh at state! i am SO proud and wish i could be there for their special game! it will be 1:30 in the morning tonight when they throw the first pitch, so i will pray before i fall asleep! :)
p.p.s. cherie, i am especially praying for you right now as i know you are anticipating a visitor soon-- He will give you the opportunity and words. i am confident.