living for the weekend!

what a great weekend it has been. it's a little crazy because it's 9 pm on sunday and i have yet to study for my finals, but it was a blessing nonetheless. friday afternoon my friend kristen came to visit and brought her baby corban. we went on a walk, caught up a tad, and then parted so she could go visit with others and so i could go on to the lodge cookout. she met back up with me before she left and actually ended up staying the night. i hadn't had the chance to talk to her let alone see her in so long and i truly had forgotten just how much i love having her a part of my life. i didn't get any studying done, but oh well. i certainly won't remember this exam in a couple years anyway...

saturday i had my final exam review for 3 hours and then kallie and andrew showed up! they went and had dinner and i sat and talked with them and we had a great discussion about heaven and end times and just all sorts of uplifting things. i can't wait to go to heaven someday-- talking about it got me seriously excited. after dinner with them we came back to the lodge and chatted for a while until they left and susan's entire family showed up. i was finally able to meet them all which was nice because i feel like i've known them forever based upon the things susan tells me. they eventually left so i did rounds and watched a movie with kent and susan. at 1:45, jessica frasso called me to let her in the lodge...we talked until after 3. hahaha. it was so great to catch up with her and have her share her life with me. i feel so honored that people let me in the way they do and i went to bed encouraged last night.

i spent most of today south of indy going to a scholarship interview in franklin, in. hopefully that went well-- i should hear back in about a week or so. i feel like i conveyed my heart well and represented Christ, not that they were looking for me to be a Christian or anything, but it is who i am. if nothing else, i hope something i said to them about the way i live my life was an encouragement or a witness. when someone asks you what you're going to do with your life or why you chose nursing or IWU, how can God not be a part of that? He is the reason i live. He is the reason i make the decisions i do. the two are really inseparable. we even talked about india in my interview and my heart for missions and the desire to use my nursing in that capacity-- very cool.

i was tearful driving south today however. lindsay's friend meredith, a woman i have been hearing about for months, is not doing well. she is losing the battle against the cancer that is raging within her entire body. i periodically check her caringbridge website, saw that yesterday was a designated fast and pray-for-meredith's-miracle day, and immediately wanted to be a part of it. after all, what is the body of Christ about if it's not lifting one another in prayer and encouraging one another, even if you've never met? when you share the most important aspect of your life together, it really doesn't matter if i've never even seen her face. well, i committed to praying and fasting yesterday and expected a miracle as i joined believers all over the world on her behalf. i was worried because others signing her guestbook would say things like, "well, your life is a miracle, even if you don't get healed." that's true, but it frustrated me! people were giving up the fight, the hope, before they even knew what the result would be. it's a protective mechanism to not want, to just expect the worse, but when i went to bed last night i really believed that i would wake up this morning and get an update that she had been healed. God doesn't do BIG things in our lives so often because we don't ask! i wanted these people to ask! i petitioned God: save her! heal her! free her from this illness and may you receive all the glory! my tiny mustard seed of faith was all in yesterday...and when i woke up this morning, nothing had changed. it hurt. i cried. it's not that i have lost faith in God-- i know He can do it, it's just a matter of wondering why He won't, especially when i believed it so hard. meredith is someone i want to ask God about when i get to heaven someday. why, God? i've never met her, but when she passes, it will hurt my heart as well.

“now all glory to God, who is able, through His mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think. glory to Him in the church and in Christ Jesus through all generations forever and ever! amen." -eph. 3:20